The following multiple-choice test is based on actual terrorist events from history. Test your knowledge and see how well your memory holds up.

1. In 1968, Bobby Kennedy was shot and killed by:

a. Superman
b. Jay Leno
c. Harry Potter
d. A Muslim male extremist between
the ages of 17 and 40

2. In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were
kidnapped and massacred by:

a. Olga Corbett
b. Sitting Bull
c. Arnold Schwarzenegger
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

3. In 1979, the U.S. embassy in Iran was seized by:

a. Lost Norwegians
b. Elvis
c. A tour bus full of 80-year-old women
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

4. During the 1980’s a number of Americans
were kidnapped in Lebanon by:

a. John Dillinger
b. The King of Sweden
c. The Boy Scouts
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

5. In 1983, the U.S. Marine barracks in Beirut
was blown up by:

a. A pizza delivery boy
b. Pee Wee Herman
c. Geraldo Rivera
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40​

6. In 1985, the cruise ship Achille Lauro was
hijacked. A 70-year-old American was murdered
and thrown overboard in his wheelchair by:

a. The Smurfs
b. Davey Jones
c. The Little Mermaid
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

7. In 1985, TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens,
and a U.S. Navy diver trying to rescue passengers
was murdered by:

a. Captain Kidd
b. Charles Lindberg
c. Mother Teresa
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

8. In 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 was bombed by:

a. Scooby Doo
b. The Tooth Fairy
c. The Sundance Kid
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

9. In 1993, the World Trade Center was bombed
the first time by:

a. Richard Simmons
b. Grandma Moses
c. Michael Jordan
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

10. In 1998, the U.S. embassies in Kenya and
Tanzania were bombed by:

a. Mr. Rogers
b. Hillary Clinton, to distract attention
from Wild Bill’s women problems
c. The World Wrestling Federation
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

11. On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked; two
were used as missiles to take out the World
Trade Centers and of the remaining two, one
crashed into the U.S. Pentagon and the other
crashed near Shanksville, Pennsylvania.
Thousands of people were killed by:

a. Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck
and Elmer Fudd
b. The Supreme Court of Florida
c. Mr. Bean
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

12. In 2002, U.S. forces fought a war in Afghanistan
against:

a. Enron
b. The Lutheran Church
c. The NFL
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

13. In 2002, reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped
and murdered by:

a. Bonnie and Clyde
b. Captain Kangaroo
c Billy Graham
d. Muslim male extremists mostly
between the ages of 17 and 40

 

14. In November 2010, the F.B.I. prevented
the bombing of a Christmas Tree Lighting
Ceremony in Portland, Oregon by:

a. Santa Claus

b. Rudolph

c. A “white supremacist”

d. A Muslim male extremist
between the ages of 17 and 40

Should we ignore this trend and our commonsense in order to avoid “profiling?”

To ensure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly fanatics intent on killing us, airport security screeners will no longer be allowed to profile certain people. They must conduct random searches of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper identification, secret agents who are members of the President’s security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of Honor winner and former Governor Joe Foss, but leave Muslim Males between the ages 17 and 40 alone lest they be guilty of profiling.

Footnote: Remember Fort Hood Texas? Another Muslim, 39 years old, killed 13 people and wounded 30 others...does this fit the profile?